Overcoming Social Anxiety – The World is a Friendly Place!
Overcoming social anxiety is easy if you know that the world is a friendly place. But, I find most people do not walk around with this mindset.
I live in a city that is by no means crime free. Sure, there are muggings and assaults and drug dealing and all the TERRIBLE CRAZY SCARY things you see on the news every night in my town. Yet I have never experienced any of these terrible things.
We generate our own reality. If you see the world as a scary place, it will be, and your social anxiety will perpetuate itself. If you see it as a great friendly place, it will be!
The first recommendation I can make to you is to stop watching the news. American news is the main reason most Americans think that the world is this horribly violent and scary place. Every single story is about this person being robbed or that person being raped. This is information you can live without knowing, trust me.
The mindset and outlook you will get by watching the news is misleading. It can also be detrimental to your life. If you walk around scared that everyone is violent and out to get you, eventually they will be.
The other day I walked by a guy who was clearly in the bloods (a violent North American gang), and I said “what’s up” to him. What did I get back? No, it wasn’t a stabbing. He said “whats good man”. Of course, because the world is a friendly place!
How does this apply to pickup?
When you assume the world is a friendly place, and you start expecting everyone to be friendly with you, well that includes girls. Talking to girls is easy when in your deep core you expect them to be friendly with you.
When you are out at the bars and clubs, just assume that everyone is REALLY nice. Overcoming social anxiety is very easy if you assume everyone is nice and your friend. You might even say it to a girl when you walk up. “Hey you looked nice I wanted to come meet you.”
The greatest part about saying something like this is the person will subconsciously want to live up to the persona that you gave them. A girl who might not be that nice with the average guy who walks up will end up being a lot nicer with you.
Being in the mindset that everyone is nice and your buddy makes it VERY easy to have a great time. When you bounce around a venue making fun conversation with everyone, people see how fun and social you are. This makes you stand out because most people walk around with the “everyone is scary” mindset.
When you do see the girl on adultfrienedfinder that you want, and show her that you are attracted, she’ll be eager to meet and get to know you. You represent the fun in the venue, simply because you are not in a fearful mindset about socializing.
So how can you go about changing your mindset from “everyone’s scary” to “everyone’s my buddy”?
A really simple exercise which I advocate is saying hi to everyone. Simply go out and say “hi” or “whats up man” or “hey dude” to every single guy and girl you pass in the course of a day. It will only take one day to realize that the world is a friendly place.
I’ve never once had a negative or mean response doing this exercise. It will really put you in a great mood and put you on the path to overcoming social anxiety. Try it!
To sum it all up:
1. Stop watching the news
2. Say hi to everyone
3. Get the girl!